What is uglier than an aardvark? Two aardvarks!

What does the aardvark call his dog? Aard-bark!

What is the difference between an aardvark and a coyote? One has a long smeller, the other, a loud yeller!

Who loves hamburgers, French fries, and ants? Ronald MacAardvark!

What does an aardvark keep in his aquarium? An aard-shark!

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What does an aardvark get when he overeats? Ant-digestion!

What does an aardvark take for ant-digestion? Anta-Seltzer!

Who's the aardvark's favorite female vocalist? Bearbara Streis-ant!

Who's aardvark's favorite male singer? Frank Sinostril!

What are the aardvark's favorite Beatle's songs? It's Been an Aards Day's Night and I Want to Hold Your Ant!

What's worse than a giraffe with a sore throat? An aardvark with the sniffles!

What does an aardvark use when he has a cold? An ant-ihistamine!

What command does the aardvark give most often when he sails? Snout about!

What does the aardvark take sailing? An aard ark!

How do ants hide from aardvarks? They disguise themselves as uncles!